My mission in life is to create a more empowered and inclusive world, one where we can all belong. And while part of making this happen includes interrupting forms of oppression through my work as a DEI expert, the personal empowerment work I do is just as important.

Why do I think this?

Because both social justice work and personal empowerment work are about making the world a better and more welcoming, accepting, and loving place for everyone who has been the target of hurtful and hateful life experiences. And when we as individuals feel strong, grounded, and empowered, we have the energy and resilience we need to help empower others.

In this #ShineWithRitu video, I share how personal empowerment is deeply connected to social justice as well as one of my favorite quotes from one of my heroes that I hope inspires you too!

Watch now!

For more videos on how to be more socially conscious and stand in your power, check out these playlists:

– Be Socially Conscious

– Stand In Your Power

The post How Social Justice is Connected to Personal Empowerment appeared first on Ritu Bhasin.

Sometimes life can feel really hard. And by sometimes, I mean a lot of the time!

There’s conflict and war all around the world, oppressive laws are being passed that seriously harm LGBTQ+ communities (and especially trans people), the global pandemic continues to make life very difficult for so many, and so much more.

And then there are the personal challenges, which there can be no shortage of (for me, at least), which can leave you feeling so stressed, sad, and deflated.

Even though I’m an optimist  — one of my key anchors is the message that “Life is both hard and beautiful” — I keep coming back to this message again and again to get me through hard times.

And in fact, this really tough period has taught me a lot about the concepts of happiness and joy. For one thing, I don’t believe there’s such a thing as a permanent state of happiness (stay tuned for a video on this — I have lots to say here!). But I’ve also learned about a key ingredient to finding joy during tough times — and it’s not about toxic positivity!

In this video, I share my anchor for finding joy during difficult moments and what you can focus on to get you through tough times.

Watch now!

#ShineWithRitu #LiveAuthentically

The post What’s the Secret to Finding Joy When Life is Hard? appeared first on Ritu Bhasin.

In fact, in measuring ourselves to an impossible standard, we actually harm our minds, bodies, and souls. When we focus on the pursuit of an unattainable goal, we deplete our energy and harm our self-esteem by subjecting ourselves to self-flogging, frustration, and doubt. Striving for perfection traps us in an endless cycle of disappointment and self-doubt, leaving us with little energy for pursuing happiness instead.

Fortunately, after years of fixating on perfection and realizing that there is no such thing as perfect(!!), I learned an important lesson and gained a helpful belief. Instead of perfection, I now focus on doing my best — no more and no less.

I learned the concept of simply doing your best in one of my favorite books: The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz. In this fabulous book, Ruiz offers a practical guide on how to avoid limiting ourselves and how to alleviate suffering. The fourth agreement, “Always Do Your Best,” emphasizes that by giving our all to everything we do in life, not only will we be productive, but it will also help us to live a more committed, whole, and rewarding life. This agreement stuck with me right away and is now a mindset that I live by.

Many great leaders and influencers also sing the virtues of doing your best. Prolific spiritualist Marianne Williamson emphasizes the importance of this in her highly popular book, A Return to Love (which I also highly recommend!). In her book she writes, “Serving three people is as important as serving 300.” In other words, the point is to put all our efforts into the quality of what we are producing!

As a public speaker and anti-racism educator who is focused on empowering people to be their best, I put the same effort into delivering my message, whether it’s to three or 300 people. It doesn’t matter the number of people I reach, if I can influence those three people as a result, I am on the way to accomplishing my goals, which brings me so much joy (and which, I’ll add, brings me so much more satisfaction than striving for perfection ever did).

When we do our best, we are more aware of ourselves, which allows us to learn from our mistakes and grow as individuals. We’re also more open to feedback and better able to practice self-compassion by no longer passing judgment or subjecting ourselves to frustration for not reaching something that was never attainable in the first place. Not to mention, we also feel good and proud of ourselves because we showed up and gave it our all.

By reframing your mindset from trying to be perfect to trying to always do your best, you’ll feel empowered to try new things and to put yourself out in the world more. The key is to remember that your best doesn’t have to be perfect — as long as you know that you tried your hardest you can feel good about yourself and your efforts.

You might be surprised at how the simple act of giving it your all will make you feel liberated, as I know I was. The next time you tackle anything, I urge you to relieve yourself of the burden of perfection. Your life will become so much better.

The post Always Strive to Do Your Best appeared first on Ritu Bhasin.

Many years ago, I was in the middle of a painful breakup, and I was devastated. I was hurting so much, and because I was hurting, I wanted my ex-boyfriend to be hurting too. I was obsessed with wanting him to feel as bad as I was feeling. I couldn’t see it at the time, but this way of thinking was actually making me feel worse.

When I shared my feelings with my bestie Nicole, she gave me some great advice. She said, “The best revenge is living well.”

This advice became my mantra for getting over my breakup. It helped me realize that focusing on myself and how I was living was a better way to move on than continuing to focus on a ghost relationship — one where the person is no longer there, but all of your energy is still being directed towards them.

It also became a philosophy for life in general and a way to help me stay focused on my personal power during hard times.

In this video, I share how focusing on living well can help you move on from any broken relationship, whether it’s a romantic relationship, a friendship, or a professional relationship, and why prioritizing self-care and self-love is ultimately what will help you to heal.

Watch now!

The post The Best Breakup Advice I Ever Got appeared first on Ritu Bhasin.

Many years ago, when I decided that authenticity was going to be one of my guiding values, I started to apply what I call the “I Don’t Give an F Plan” to everything I did. The “I Don’t Give an F Plan” is very simple: it basically means that you stop worrying about what others think.

It means letting go of how others may judge you or perceive you for how you live. It means living in accordance with what makes you happy and what makes you who you are. It means feeling free to be your perfectly imperfect self, and if you want to feel free, unencumbered, and empowered then this is the plan for you!

I started living by this plan when I was writing The Authenticity Principle. In doing the deep self-reflection work required to write the book, I realized that even though I had come a long way in living authentically since my younger years, I was still holding back in certain areas because I feared the judgment of others.

But I didn’t want to hold back anymore. I wanted to live the way I wanted to live in every way possible! I wanted to stop giving an F. So I did.

In this video, I talk about what makes the “I Don’t Give an F Plan” so satisfying and give you some tips and tricks so you can learn to stop giving an F and start living your best.

Watch now!

The post Care Less About What Others Think with the “I Don’t Give an F Plan” appeared first on Ritu Bhasin.

Each of these books has taught me a key lesson about authenticity, perseverance, and more, and I want to share them with you so that you can use the knowledge and wisdom of their authors to live better.

1. The Gifts of Imperfection by Brené Brown

Chances are, you’ve heard of Brené Brown. Whether you’ve checked out her famous TED Talk or seen her hanging with Oprah, you might be familiar with her teachings on the power of vulnerability. She’s written a few books now, but it’s especially worth delving into this one in order to get a deeper understanding of her work.

In particular, I love how she describes the profound difference between what it means to belong and what it means to “fit in” — a distinction that, to me, is critical for understanding how each of us can embrace and live with authenticity.

For me, Brown’s lessons on vulnerability have been life-changing. It’s hella hard work, but the rewards of learning how to reframe vulnerability as a positive thing are vast. Leaning into my own vulnerability has helped unlock my ability to be authentic and to connect with others. And in fact, let me state unequivocally: authentic living demands vulnerability!

2. Buddha’s Brain: The Practical Neuroscience of Happiness, Love, and Wisdom by Dr. Rick Hanson

I love, love, love this book and have turned to it so many times for guidance. Dr. Hanson beautifully weaves together insights from neuroscience and mindfulness and presents real-world strategies for practicing both in order to rewire our brains, change our behaviors, and increase our happiness. (And who doesn’t want that?)

For example, the simple act of touching your lips — something I’ve been doing unconsciously for years — can have a soothing effect, since parasympathetic fibers in the lips stimulate the part of the nervous system that tells us to relax. Who knew?! This is just one of myriad simple and practical strategies outlined in this fantastic book.

3. The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz

I turn to this book a few times every year to remind myself of Ruiz’s four guidelines for how we can avoid limiting ourselves, alleviate our own suffering, and live better. I’ve even saved the Four Agreements themselves in a note on my phone that I look at periodically for guidance.

Two of Ruiz’s agreements — “Don’t Take Things Personally” and “Don’t Make Assumptions” — have always particularly resonated with me. As a young person filled with insecurities, I often took things personally growing up. When people were treating me badly or being less than lovely, I would always blame myself, believing something was wrong with me rather than recognizing that their behavior was a reflection of themselves.

The first time I read this book, I realized that my assumptions for all those years were likely very wrong, and that it wasn’t about me at all — it was about the person who was hurting me. It was a freeing revelation, and I believe that everyone can benefit from Ruiz’s lessons in this short but powerful book.

4. My Grandmother’s Hands by Resmaa Menakem

As part of my commitment to living my best and to doing my best in teaching others to live an empowered and inclusive life, a few years ago I decided to complete a trauma therapist certification program. It was through my trauma studies that I came across Resmaa’s work and his incredible book!

In his book, Resmaa explores how racism and white supremacy lives in our bodies — for everyone, including people of color, Indigenous Peoples, and white people. More importantly, he sets out in great detail what to do about this, and in particular, how to release the grip of racism from our bodies. Reading Resmaa’s book has been life-altering. Run, don’t walk, to get it!

5. The Authenticity Principle by Ritu Bhasin

You didn’t think I’d make a reading list about authenticity and living your best and leave my own book out, did you?!

I wrote my book The Authenticity Principle as a rallying cry against conformity. I know firsthand what it’s like to feel like you have to wear a mask to fit in, and after years of battling against conformity, racism, self-loathing, and more, I committed to embracing authenticity and choosing to be my authentic self despite my fear of judgment.

Choosing authenticity changed my life in so many positive ways, and I know it will change your life too. I wrote this book to spread a new message about finding empowerment on your own terms, and I know it will help you to do just that.

Which books have had the biggest impact on how you live? What did they teach you?

The post Five Must-Read Books That Should Be on the Reading List of Anyone Who Wants to Live Their Best Life appeared first on Ritu Bhasin.

Picture a moment when someone says something in your presence that feels racist, sexist, or otherwise offensive. You know, one of those comments that make you think, “WTF, did you really just say that?!?”, but that causes you to freeze in your tracks?

It happens to many of us unfortunately.

We freeze in these moments because our bodies are gripped by discomfort, which causes us to not know how to respond in the moment. Our bodies are literally too occupied with being stunned! For a lot of us, it’s not until later at home or when we’re back at our desks that we craft the perfect response.

While these moments are unfortunately all too common for some of us — hello to my fellow women and women of color — there is a powerful thing that you can do to help you to address offensive remarks when they’re made, and not feel regret for not responding in a way that you would have wanted to.

In this video, I share my technique for calling out offensive remarks so that you are better prepared going forward.

Watch now!

The post Want to Call Out Racist Remarks? You Must Do This appeared first on Ritu Bhasin.