women of color Archives - Ritu Bhasin https://ritubhasin.com/blog/tag/women-of-color/ Wed, 10 Aug 2022 16:10:25 +0000 en-US hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=6.5.2 https://ritubhasin.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/07/RB_Favicon-Sugar-Plum-100x100.png women of color Archives - Ritu Bhasin https://ritubhasin.com/blog/tag/women-of-color/ 32 32 Women Deserve to be Paid More: How to Ask for a Raise (And Get One!) https://ritubhasin.com/blog/how-to-ask-for-a-raise/ Sat, 26 Feb 2022 09:00:00 +0000 https://staging.ritubhasin.com/?p=6711 We know from extensive research that women are still being paid less than men for the same work, and as women, we often don't ask to be paid what we rightly deserve. Read more to find out how to ask for a raise (and get one!)

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The other week I was having a conversation with one of my friends about women’s history month coming up, and the topic of the gender pay gap came up. We talked about how frustrating and unbelievable it is that women are STILL being paid less than men for the same work. Argh, patriarchy and sexism at its finest!

We know from extensive research this is a real thing: women continue to be paid significantly less than men for the same work. This happens for a range of reasons — all rooted in misogyny, patriarchy, and sexism — and shows up as gender bias in key decision-making moments in the workplace.

We also know that, as women, we often don’t ask to be paid what we rightly deserve. This can happen because of our experiences with gender bias, feeling not worthy enough and like we didn’t deserve it, worrying that we’re “faking” our achievements (hello impostor syndrome) and so much more. Over time, this constant negative messaging becomes internalized, and we actually start to believe these thoughts.

But here’s the thing: we need to be able to recognize our true value. As women, we need to ask for more because we’re worth it and we deserve it!

Know What You Deserve — and Then Go Get It

You may remember from my personal story that I’m a former lawyer turned HR executive turned DEI consultant and empowerment speaker, so I’ve been having career development conversations — including conversations about salary — with women for over 20 years. I’d be the first to tell you that asking to be paid more can feel like a tricky, if not impossible, conversation to navigate. But if you don’t stand in your power and take the initiative to ask, employers may not offer you your true value.

I know this experience firsthand. Throughout my career as a Woman of Color, I got sick of being underpaid and undercut for my value. Eventually I finally decided to stand in my power and ask to be paid more than market value. I knew I was excellent, and I knew my own worth, so I asked for what I deserved — and after much effort, I got it!

I didn’t just waltz into my boss’s office one day and ask for a raise. I had a step-by-step plan that I rehearsed and prepared to ensure I was showing up at my best in that moment.

Based on my experience, here are the 6 steps you’ll want to take when asking for a pay raise in your current job. So, grab a pen and take notes as I take you through the dos and don’ts of asking to be paid more.

6 Steps for Asking for a Raise

Step #1: Know the Salary Range for Your Specific Job Within Your Organization

The first step is to figure out what the going salary range is for your job within your organization. You’ll want to figure out what your organization is roughly paying other employees who are doing the same job as you.

You can ask your HR department or your colleagues, but one of the most important groups of people to ask about salary are those who have already left the organization. People who have left are more willing to share about salary after they’re gone than when they’re working in the organization. Start having these conversations now!

Step #2: Know the Market

The next step is to conduct some research and look into what the market range is for your job across industries. Figure out what other people are being paid for your current job at other organizations and in other sectors. This is a really important step that will help you to better understand the current salary range on the market for your job — which, in turn, will help you to have a more thorough and convincing conversation with your boss.

Step #3: Arrange A Meeting With your Boss

After you finish your research, the next step is to actually schedule a meeting with your boss to talk about your raise. Make sure that you’re very clear and direct about this from the get-go. Let them know you’d like to speak to them about an increase in your compensation. Don’t be vague or shy here! The more direct you are in the beginning, the more likely you’ll get what you actually ask for. Whether your meeting is in person or online, use these tips to help you be better prepared to speak.

Step #4: Script and Practice

So now the meeting is scheduled, but what you do leading up to the meeting is just as important as what happens during the meeting. Preparation is key here — be sure you know exactly what you’re going to say and how you’re going to say it and write ALL of it down. (Pro tip: utilize a tool called scripting to help you prepare for what want to say. Check out my video here or download my scripting worksheet here.)

List out all of the reasons why you think you deserve to be paid more and refer back to the research you conducted in steps 1 and 2. Once you finish writing your script, don’t just stop there — rehearse it! Practice, practice, and practice again to make sure your script is solid. That way, when you’re nervous or triggered during the meeting you’ll have the words ready for you at your disposal when you need them.

Step #5: Meet and Follow Up

You’re now prepared as you’ll ever be, and you know exactly what you want and how you’re going to ask for it. You have your meeting with your boss, and (fingers crossed!) it goes really well. Now what? The work doesn’t stop there — following up with your boss immediately after your meeting is a critical step. Follow up in writing by summarizing the discussion and what your expectations are in an email. This not only creates a paper trail for HR, but it also signals to your boss that this is very important to you.

Step #6: Follow Up Again!

So you send your first follow up email immediately after your meeting. Your boss acknowledges it, but weeks go by and you hear nothing. After all that hard work and preparation, this is the last thing you want to happen! Step 6 is to consistently follow up until you get a resolution. Oftentimes bosses or leaders will have these types of conversations and then “take it away” for weeks and weeks on end before doing anything about it. By consistently following up and reminding them, you’re showing how important this is to you and how seriously you’re taking it. So if you don’t hear back after the first time, follow up again!

Shut Down the Noise — You Got This!

These six steps will help you feel more confident going into conversations with your boss about your compensation. These conversations aren’t easy, and there’s no magic formula to follow — but hopefully these 6 steps will be a good jumping off point for you to ask for what you want.

As women, we’re constantly being undervalued and told that there are so many things that are wrong with us — that we’re not smart enough, that we’re too bossy, that we’re not capable, and more. But you have the power to shut down this noise and fight for what you’re worth — because you deserve it!

The next time you’re looking for a new job or negotiating a salary at your current role, follow these six steps as you prepare to ask for a raise. Stand in your power, do the research, and ask for what you’re worth. Good luck!

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The Importance of Hair for Women of Color https://ritubhasin.com/blog/the-importance-of-hair-for-women-of-color/ Thu, 20 Aug 2020 14:22:00 +0000 https://ritu.piknikmarketing.co/2020/08/20/the-importance-of-hair-for-women-of-color/ Women of color have had a unique, and often challenging, journey and experience with their hair for many reasons.

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As women of color, we often have a very difficult and challenging journey and experience with our hair for many reasons — the fundamental reason being white supremacy and racism. Instead of celebrating our hair, reveling in its connection to our culture and to feeling both authentic and beautiful, so many of us feel pushed to change our hair or to protect and defend it.

And yes, I know that with everything we’ve seen happening throughout this racial injustice crisis moment talking about hair and what you do with it may seem superficial, but hair has huge significance for so many of us as women of color, as it is deeply tied to our cultural identities.

In this video, I talk about why we must interrupt the biases around hair and beauty that impact women of color.

Watch now!

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How I Claim Physical Space as a Woman of Color https://ritubhasin.com/blog/how-i-claim-physical-space-as-a-woman-of-color/ Sun, 19 Jul 2020 13:00:00 +0000 https://ritu.piknikmarketing.co/2020/07/19/how-i-claim-physical-space-as-a-woman-of-color/ As a woman of color, I’ve often been forced to think about how I claim physical space in my professional life.

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Over the last few months, I’ve been teaching about how to be an inclusive leader during this time of crisis and about how to thrive personally and professionally while working remotely, especially if you’re a diverse professional.

So recently, when a client asked me for advice on how a leader should physically position themselves to facilitate more inclusive meetings, the answer quickly flowed out of me, because body language and body positioning is something I often think and teach about in the context of career advancement.

As a woman of color, I’ve often been forced to think about how I claim physical space in my professional life. I’ve become an expert on it — not just because I teach leadership for a living, but because in order to be seen, heard, and respected as a woman of color in workplaces, I’ve had to pay extra attention to this aspect of how I present myself in order to gain respect and be taken seriously. In a nutshell, how we use our bodies matters, and it’s so important for women of color to claim physical space.

Women of color have intersecting identities, and as a result, we are on the receiving end of both gender bias and racial bias. As I’ve said before, the impact of this bias on how we experience the world is real — and because of this, many of us have developed personal strategies for navigating around this reality.

Now you might be thinking, “I’m the one experiencing bias here and, on top of that, it’s on me to take steps to deflect it?!” Having to take proactive steps to shield against bias as a woman of color, feels like adding insult to injury, and I totally get it. In fact, I think often about how shitty it is to experience the burden of the oppressed, a phrase that I first heard from my fellow social justice activist Jeewan Chanicka, and which I think about all the time.

That said, I’ve seen how helpful it’s been to my own career development to actively shield against bias. I’ve found that one of the most effective ways to do this is to consciously and deliberately take up physical space — using body language and body positioning — in ways that assert my power and make others more likely to notice me in a positive way.

Here are a few of the ways that we as women of color can strategically claim physical space in our work lives as a means of standing in our power, being seen, and projecting authority.

Sit in Your Power at Meetings

One of the biases often leveled at women of color is that we’re not seen as being authoritative, and we’re not associated with positions of power. To combat this, when I’m running a meeting, I always try to sit at the head of the table to signal my power in the room.

I also tend to perch on the edge of my chair, lean my body forward, and use expansive/animated arm gestures to command attention and take up more physical space. It also helps me to sit with my spine straight and my shoulders relaxed with my feet flat on the floor (which also has the benefit of promoting deep breathing). (This applies to virtual meetings too!)

If you’re not in a leadership position, consider sitting next to the leader. You’re more likely to be alert and present during the meeting if you sit there, and you’re more likely to be noticed too, since everyone will already be looking in that direction.

When you speak, use your body language to take up physical space — sit up straight, lean forward, and use hand or arm gestures to the degree that feels natural and comfortable for you. All of this helps to signal authority and presence, which ultimately should help you to be taken seriously and viewed as powerful by others.

Use Power Poses for Confidence and Presence

In her research on the effectiveness of power poses, the formidable Amy Cuddy emphasizes that your body changes your mind, your mind changes your behavior, and your behavior changes outcomes. Whether you’re presenting in front of a group, attending an event, or having a discussion with a colleague in the hallway, how you position your body while standing can have a profound impact on how others perceive you — and how powerful you yourself will feel.

In her book Presence (which I refer to in The Authenticity Principle), Cuddy explains how putting yourself into a power position (standing up straight, feet hip-distance apart, facing forward, hands on your hips — think tadasana or “mountain pose” in yoga) will automatically help to decrease cortisol (the stress hormone) and increase testosterone (the confidence hormone), which will help you feel more empowered.

To learn more about how you can use power poses, check out Cuddy’s awesome TED Talk.

Assert Yourself in Groups — Even When It’s Tough

Whenever I am in a group setting, particularly if I’m one of the only women of color, I’m alive to the fact that I may not be seen or heard unless I’m deliberate about it.

I can remember one women’s leadership event I went to that was attended exclusively by white women (and me). At the event, I felt overlooked, ignored, and disrespected by the attendees that I introduced myself to. It was years ago, and I haven’t forgotten the pain of that experience to this day. Unfortunately, this will sound familiar for many women of color.

There may not have been much I could do to overcome the biases present at that event, but in general there are a few things we can do to shield against bias and prevent ourselves from being overlooked in group settings.

Firstly, when you join circles of conversation, don’t hang towards the back — insert yourself assertively, and stand next to the person who’s talking. Next, make sure you speak at least once in the discussion, and when you do, speak loudly enough to be heard.

Don’t hold back in being yourself when you speak — be authentic and let your spirit shine through. If you’re struggling with confidence or nerves in this kind of situation, use the power of self-coaching (positive, encouraging words) to guide yourself through.

Facing the realities of insidious gender and racial bias (and the intersectionality of the two!) is incredibly difficult to withstand. Being overlooked and undervalued hurts, and it feels especially unfair that as women of color we must go to greater lengths to ensure that our voices are heard and our presence is felt.

But at the end of the day, you deserve to live the life that you want and to thrive in your career. And you can by knowing that you are worthy and literally claiming your space.

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It’s Hard to be an Indian Woman https://ritubhasin.com/blog/its-hard-to-be-an-indian-woman/ Thu, 12 Mar 2020 13:00:00 +0000 https://ritu.piknikmarketing.co/2020/03/12/its-hard-to-be-an-indian-woman/ It’s tough to be a woman. But as an Indian woman, it can feel even harder because of how intensely misogyny permeates all aspects of our culture.

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Being a woman can be really hard at times. We get overlooked at work. We get body shamed. We get constant unsolicited advice about our relationships — or lack thereof — and our fertility.

On top of all of this, as an Indian woman, I can affirm that it’s tough to be a woman at times because of how intensely misogyny permeates all aspects of our culture. It’s difficult for us to talk openly about this because of our fear of affirming racial biases that are directed towards our culture. But we must openly name the oppression that Indian women experience.

In other videos, I talk a lot about other challenges that we experience in Indian culture, but in this video, in particular, I address the oppression of Indian women and offer my advice on how to overcome this.

Some of this may feel really uncomfortable for you. I understand that, but if we want to be part of a world where everyone has access to experiencing freedom, joy, authenticity, empowerment, and inclusion, we must talk about this more openly.

Watch now!

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4 Ways I’m Underestimated as a Woman of Color https://ritubhasin.com/blog/4-ways-im-underestimated-as-a-woman-of-color/ https://ritubhasin.com/blog/4-ways-im-underestimated-as-a-woman-of-color/#comments Sun, 24 Nov 2019 13:00:00 +0000 https://ritu.piknikmarketing.co/2019/11/24/4-ways-im-underestimated-as-a-woman-of-color/ Racism is real, and it seems as though now more than ever before it’s being called out in the public sphere. The unfortunate truth for people of color is that what we’re finally seeing discussed in the mainstream just affirms what we already know is true

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Racism is real. From the recent report on the increase in hate crimes to the El Paso shooting to being arrested for waiting at Starbucks as a black man, it’s clear that the sting of racism infiltrates all aspects of our society.

As people of color and Indigenous peoples, white supremacy and racism show up constantly in our everyday lives and permeate everything we do. Sometimes the racism feels very direct, like violence or a state-sanctioned violation of our rights. But often it’s far less overt, which can make it more insidious.

One way that racism consistently shows up for me as a brown woman is in constantly being underestimated. (I note that, for me, the intersection of race/ethnoculture and gender has an amplifying effect on the racism coming my way — the racism I experience is often sexist, and the sexism I experience is often racist.) When I was younger and people signaled that they didn’t believe in my value, I would question my own behavior (which I discuss in my book). But now I have crystal clarity about how racial bias — and what may at first appear to be simple acts of disrespect — impacts how I’m treated.

Here are a few examples of how I’m underestimated as a woman of color.

“Are you supposed to be here?”

I travel a lot for work and find myself spending a lot of time in transit with fancy business types — mostly older white men, and very few people who look like me. Because I fly so often, I’ve racked up a high frequent flyer status with my favorite airline, which allows me to be at the front of the line for boarding. I can’t tell you how many times I have been asked (by fellow passengers, usually trying to butt in line) to confirm that I’m in the correct line for boarding. Often I’m met with confusion by people who assume, at first glance, that I couldn’t possibly be in Zone 1 of the plane.

This happens to me a few times a month, and every time I ask myself why I’m experiencing this type of questioning behavior when others in the same line are not. The fact is, these experiences tie back to judgments made about me as a brown-skinned woman. The people in these encounters underestimate me, assuming that, as a woman of color, I couldn’t be “fancy” enough or “important” enough to board first.

“Are you really worth this much?”

In my work as a global speaker on leadership and diversity, my abilities, level of excellence, and value are often blatantly underestimated. Frequently, people will come up to me after a presentation and say some version of, “I wasn’t expecting much from this presentation, but you really surprised me. You were amazing!” Which leads me to wonder: Why did you assume my presentation wouldn’t be of high quality?

I’m also frequently challenged on my pricing, particularly by new clients. A while back, I had a first-time client literally yell at me over the phone, saying, “Are you kidding me? You’re trying to charge the same rate as investment bankers on Bay Street (Canada’s Wall Street)!” Because I had already signed the agreement, I proceeded with the work. After my presentation, this same individual came up to me and said, “Now I understand why you charge what you do. That was excellent.”

It often feels like, as a woman of color, my credentials and CV are simply not enough to prove my value as a professional. I’m constantly having to “re-audition” for a role that I’ve been an expert in for years now, decades into my career. I know that being questioned in this way is not the norm for similarly qualified, or even less qualified, white men in my field. Again, when it comes to my work, I’m being underestimated because of others’ biases.

“People don’t care what you have to say.”

When I launched my book The Authenticity Principle in 2017, I hired a (white, cisgender woman) publicist to help land media coverage. She pitched the book, which reveals my experiences with bias at work and how to interrupt these types of experiences, to a mainstream TV program. At first the producers, with whom she’d worked often, avoided her messages. After persisting, she was finally told outright that the topic was “too provocative” for them to cover.

Upon getting this news, my publicist was shocked — she’d never been treated like this by a network, and she rightly identified it as racism, which was very upsetting for her. She couldn’t believe that a topic that is highly relevant among people of color could be considered too provocative for a mainstream TV program that regularly covers cutting-edge topics, and whose audience is drawn from a huge multi-cultural city.

I, on the other hand, was not surprised. I knew that it would be an uphill battle to get mainstream coverage as a woman of color — despite the media’s refrain that it wants more diversity but can’t find it.

“Are you really good enough?”

A while back, I was put forward for a leadership speaker’s series at a top institution by an esteemed leader there who knows my work well. Right away it became clear that the event director perceived this as a favor and assumed that I wasn’t qualified to be featured at an event. He immediately scheduled me into a bad time slot — a Friday afternoon in the summer — knowing that most of their usual audience would be unavailable.

As soon as I saw his email with the time it was scheduled, I knew that he expected very little of my talk — both the quality and potential turnout. Of course, I wrote back to advocate for a prime time slot, because I know my value and there was no way I was going to do the event without one.

Yet again, I was underestimated. Despite being endorsed by a well-respected leader in the organization — and despite the fact that I’m a professional speaker who does nearly 100 gigs per year — the event director (wrongly!) assumed that nobody would want to attend my event.

It’s Not in My Imagination

Some people who don’t regularly experience racism may argue that there are factors besides race/ethnoculture and gender at play in these experiences. They’ll say it’s because people are just jerks. Or maybe it’s an age thing. Maybe someone was just having a bad day. Maybe you’re reading into it. Or perhaps you’re just too sensitive.

But when I recount these stories to other women of color, they know exactly what I mean, because they too have experienced the intersection of racism and sexism.

We live in a society entrenched in misogyny and white supremacy, and it does show up in our lived experiences. It’s critical that we recognize this for what it is and keep sharing our stories to help others understand the hurt, the exhaustion, and the setbacks that result from our experiences.

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