What to do When People Keep Asking Where You’re *Really* From

As a woman of color, I’m no stranger to dealing with racial micro-aggressions on an almost daily basis, from people pronouncing my name incorrectly to people touching my hair uninvited.

All of these behaviors are problematic and upsetting — and manifestations of white supremacy — but one of the micro-aggressions that really gets to me is when someone asks me, “Where are you from?” followed by, “No, where are you really from?”

I have been asked variations of this question more times than I can count, and after a while it starts to feel like the people asking this are actually saying, “You aren’t from here, and you don’t belong here because you’re not white.”

Being asked this repeatedly can be incredibly hurtful for people of color, but there are ways you can respond that will leave you feeling empowered.

In this video, I share three ways you can respond to questions about where you’re “really” from and some tips for people who want to ask about another person’s culture in an inclusive — and not racist — way.

Watch now!